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Here’s a list of the new wrinkles I gained in my brain today:

  • Fast food is ALWAYS bad for you, regardless if it smells great
  • Mom’s cooking was always amazing
  • Dad’s grilling matched up to it
  • Family is a terrible thing to neglect
  • Balance and symmetry are beautiful
  • Angles yield to curves
  • Dancing is one of the most intimate forms of contact we humans can have
  • I will never, ever, ever understand women or the effects they have on the male half of our species.

The TV screen is blank I stare at the world around me and wonder WTF is the deal why do I hurt why did I hurt her how can I fix things…too many pies that have had my hand in them now lie rarely used on the side of my journey’s road I wanna get to and do all of them at once without my fingers hurting as I type this noise out but fear enters the equation and skews things to ends untold.

I RELEASE YOU, FEAR! Into the world you go to cause pain, terror and anguish to untold billions, with the fraction of a small percentage being able to rise above you and conquer you, make you their lapdog. All others are bound to you, bound in your grip of iron-sulfur pain, the delicate writhings of blood coursing through your veins, on your hands, on your soul. You frighten me and make me sick, for I asked to live in a world without fear, and was denied with a stamp that showed I was found unworthy and sent home to repack my things and get my life in order.

The boxes remain sealed, the drawers remain empty.

No one moves on without moving.

I do miss her still. Wouldst thou leave my thoughts and fly into yonder star? Thine actions would bring great relief to my soul.

I RELEASE YOU, FLAME! Out into the world you go, to live happily on the arm of another, doting, praying, smiling, and dying with the one of your choice, feeling the warm body of love and kindness next to you…something which you were loathe to accept from me. Run toward the yellow-peach light of bounty, pride, forgiveness, and satisfaction—run as fast as you can toward the new day, the sunrise of your life you’ve seen coming when I was timezones behind.

I AM READY, DESTINY! Ready to seize my own future with a deathgrip, willing to abandon myself to the track I was set to follow, and able—through training, experience, and luck—to burn into the mad streetrace of life and pump 900 horsepower of BADASS through my pipes.

Goodbye, fear. I am no longer your puppet.

Goodbye, flame. I wish you the best and wish you no more.

Hello, destiny. I am ready to rock.


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